Woman accused of ‘ruining’ her friend’s wedding after refusing to let her borrow dress

For some brides, a wedding dress isn’t particularly important and will be something they donate or sell on once they’ve tied the knot with their partner.

But for others, the dress they wore on their wedding day holds sentimental value, and they’ll keep it in their wardrobe for years to come as a reminder of their special day.

And while neither approach to the wedding dress is wrong, one woman has found herself being slammed by her friend for holding onto her dress for sentimental reasons – because she thinks she should be able to wear it to her own wedding instead.

The woman explained she hadn’t talked to the friend in question since she was in school, and said she had always had a reputation for being “untrustworthy”, especially when it came to borrowing things from people.

So when she messaged her out of the blue to ask if she could borrow the woman’s wedding dress because of her “super strict budget”, the woman said no – and was then accused of “ruining” her pal’s big day.

In a Reddit post, she said: “Quick background: this friend and I used to be friends in elementary school and she was known to be very untrustworthy. She would forget to give you back things she borrowed until you gave up, she would say one thing and then backtrack and say she never did, that sort of stuff. We fell out of touch in high school and I got married back in 2017 to my late husband.

“She recently messaged me on Facebook complimenting my wedding photos, and we chatted and caught up. She told me she was getting married soon. I said congrats and asked about details and if she had picked a dress to be polite.

“She said ‘That’s actually what I wanted to talk to you about. We are on a super strict budget right now and I was wondering if you would be kind enough to lend me your dress to wear’. I told her I appreciate the compliments but that I didn’t feel comfortable lending her my dress. That it was very sentimental and I just didn’t really want anyone else to wear it.

“She freaked out and basically blamed me for ruining her wedding, and that I’ll be the reason she won’t have anything to wear or will go broke finding something. That I’ll never wear it again so I should let another poor bride feel pretty. And that she thought I was nicer and less selfish.”

The woman then told her friend that “her financial problems aren’t my problem”, and admitted that she was concerned that she wouldn’t give the wedding dress back afterwards.

She added: “This is where I may be the a**hole. I got mad and told her that she wasn’t entitled to my dress just because she’s poor. That her financial problems aren’t my problem. That me having my old wedding outfits are my choice and that I frankly just didn’t trust that she would give it back to me.

“She got upset and said she changed that she doesn’t do that kind of stuff anymore but I blocked her.”

Commenters on the post were on the woman’s side, with many saying that no one else is entitled to wear her wedding dress.

One person said: “It’s your dress. You don’t have to loan it to anyone. And there are places that you can actually rent a wedding dress.”

While another added: “I understand having a budget for her wedding but they didn’t budget in for a wedding dress. I’ve seen [cheaper] wedding dresses that are beautiful.”